Here at The Gazette, we have our share of wacky moments. We decided to share some of them. If you don't like the "humor," then kindly refer to the title of this column. * * * FULL SERVICE: Monday's snowfall has the kid down the street, who mows yards to make money during his summer vacation, worried. He says he is willing to shovel snow, if the need should arise, once school gets out. * * * AVOIDING DETOURS: For the second year in a row, Highway 10 is detoured in the Stevens Point area. Last year, it was because the Clark Street bridge was being replaced. This year Clark and Main streets are getting ripped up in the vicinity of Minnesota Avenue. Since we live here, we have to put up with it. What's the chance that after two years people "just passing through" won't find another east-west path across Wisconsin? * * * LOGICAL EXPLANATION: Everyone knows that "April showers bring May flowers," but what do May flowers bring? According to Elizabeth Wescott, May flowers bring Pilgrims. * * * ROOFTOP ADVENTURE: Everyone hears the tale about the person who drives off leaving a bag of groceries or a purse on the roof of their vehicle. Jacki Nowak added a modern twist, driving off with her cellphone perched on the roof. We know we won't see her talking and driving with that phone. * * * EARTH WEEK EVENT: With Earth Week coming up next week, The Gazette thought it would be good to sponsor a "Bike or Walk to Work Week." After checking with our corporate attorneys, however, we decided that the risk of liability from lawsuit from those suffering heart attacks would be too great. Instead, we've decided to sponsor a "Drive a Little Slower to Work Week." What the heck, it'll save a little gasoline. * * * THE BRIGHT SIDE: Speaking of gasoline, some estimates say the price at the pump will be $2.50 or more this summer. The good news is some of those big, old gas-guzzling monsters might be available at a cheap price before the end of the year. * * * THE PETS WE LOVE: So, what's worse, a stray cat that craps in other people's yards and kills songbirds, or one of those monster dogs that look like they're bred to kill everyone but their master on sight? * * * EVEN WASHING DOESN'T HELP: The ritual of washing feet as Jesus did on Holy Thursday continues in many area churches. At the end of a service after the ritual was observed last week, an individual came up to another who had his feet washed and said, "Well, we know who represented Judas tonight." * * * EASTER, RING, RING: The Easter vigil candles had been lighted, and the people were all gathered in their seats. The good reverend and his servers were ready to begin, and so was the choir. But wait, that noise, what could it be? A message from on high? Not unless Jesus was calling on that cell phone tinkling in the back row. * * * NO THANK YOU, PLEASE: The snow was falling on Monday last when two fellows met on a city street. "Looks like we're having a Canadian summer," said one to the other. What could be worse? If the black flies come with it. * * * NOT DIRTY DANCING: The big newspaper from Milwaukee reported this week that there's growing concern among parents about their children's "dirty dancing" at high school proms and the like. Gads, the kids were doing dances like, "The Twist." Haven't we been here before? Those parents who didn't engage in a little "dirty dancing" when they were teens probably aren't sure how the stork found out where to deliver the baby. * * * JUST KIDDING, MAYBE: Signs in the parking ramp elevator at the Phoenix, Ariz., airport: "Attention: No Copulating in the Elevator," and "Warning: Staring at elevator panel numbers can cause blindness." There were no warnings not to engage in dirty dancing. * * * SPRING DARTING: It's springtime, when a Dart's fancy turns to Intrepids. Yes, it was seen on the north side of Stevens Point, when a 1965 Dodge Dart, overcome by spring fever, sidled up to a cute Dodge Intrepid at a stop sign and revved up its engine. The Intrepid was seen to accelerate quickly, leaving the Dart in its dust. Proud and unbent, the Dart rumbled through the intersection, leaving only the slightest puff of gray exhaust in its wake. * * * LEAPING LAMBEAU BONDS: Investment companies report that the Green Bay/Brown County Professional Football Stadium District is issuing $160 million in tax-free bonds to help finance the Lambeau (INSERT NAME OF COMPANY THAT BUYS NAMING RIGHTS HERE) Field renovation project. Investment firms note that the bonds may not be suitable for all investors, especially those in lower tax brackets. That apparently means people who don't have sky box seats need not consider the bonds. Since the people who buy the bonds will likely be sky box occupants, the Packers are reportedly considering "elevator sky boxes" that lower to the sidelines after the Packers score a touchdown so that the well-paid athletes can leap into the arms of their well-healed supporters. * * * SPRING IS HERE: Forget seeing the first robin or a sprouting crocus. You know it's really spring outside when there is still some daylight left after a County Board meeting wraps up.